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‍International Survivors of Suicide Day is acknowledged every year on the Saturday before Thanksgiving. This is a day that recognizes those affected by suicide loss and helps bring awareness to ways we can support them. Below you’ll find resources for loss survivors and ways you can help a loved one who is a loss survivor.

Resources for suicide loss survivors

If you or a loved one has suffered a loss by suicide, the resources below can help with processing and healing from the loss:

Helpful books - Understand that there is no wrong way to grieve. Everyone’s journey through grief is unique and personal. It can be helpful to read about others’ experiences and the coping techniques they found the most useful. The American Foundation of Suicide Prevention has a curated booklist for loss survivors.
Support groups - A step further than reading about a similar journey is surrounding yourself with people who have the closest understanding of what you are feeling. Support groups are a wonderful way to accomplish this. Many support groups are led by mental health specialists who can help guide you through your grief and even recommend more resources based on your situation. To find a support group near you, visit the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention.
Journaling - Getting your thoughts and feelings on paper is a great way to express yourself and help make sense of the wide range of emotions you’re experiencing. If you find yourself staring at a blank page, try a grief journal. You can find several grief journals on places like Amazon and Etsy.
Therapy - Making counseling a part of your journey can be a valuable part of your healing journey. Mental health professionals are experts in grief counseling who will help you maintain hope and patience as you navigate your grief journey.
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Surround yourself with support

Losing a loved one to suicide is a traumatic experience that can lead to mental health disorders such as PTSD, anxiety, and depression. It’s important to find a trustworthy support network early. Your support network should include a variety of individuals that bring you different levels of support - close friends, family, support groups, and therapists.
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Give yourself permission to feel everything

Remember that all your feelings are valid. It’s perfectly normal to feel angry at the person you’re grieving. It’s also normal to vacillate between anger, guilt, and sadness as you process the loss. Understand that at some point you will find yourself starting to smile and laugh again. Try not to feel guilty; you will never forget the person you loved, but eventually the extreme sadness will fade and you’ll be able to enjoy the memories you made together.
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How to support a loved one who is a loss survivor

If you know someone who is a suicide loss survivor, don’t be afraid to reach out to them. They’ll appreciate your presence in whatever capacity you’re able to show up. A few things to keep in mind if you find yourself unsure of how to offer support:

Avoid hurtful cliches - Phrases like, “they’re in a better place”, “everything happens for a reason”, or “time heals all wounds'' - these are unhelpful and invalidate the loss survivor’s feelings.
Respect privacy - Never ask about the circumstances of their loved one's death, or what might have led to it - these are intimate details that are private and irrelevant to the loss survivor's journey through grief.
Avoid passing judgment - Never place blame or judgment on the suicide victim. Suicide is an unfortunate end to an individual's immense level of pain or emotional distress. It should never be dismissed as a sign of weakness, "the easy way out", or selfish.
Avoid saying “I understand” - unless you are also a loss survivor, this is also an invalidating phrase that hurts more than helps.
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Stay connected to survivors of suicide

The very best thing you can do for someone who is a survivor of suicide loss is not disappear. Many loss survivors have spoken out about the sudden loss of friends, which adds to their grievance. There are many ways you can show support. Call or send messages of support. Deliver a meal or offer to spend time with them. Don’t be afraid to say their loved one’s name and honor their memory in some way. You could also attend a Survivor Day event with your grieving loved one - search for one near you here.
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Seek professional help

Friends and family members may desperately want to heal survivors of suicide, but they don’t have the resources of someone professionally trained to help survivors through their grief. A therapist can act as an impartial party who uses proven techniques to help survivors process anger, guilt, and grief, and move on from the loss in a healthy manner.

If you or someone you know is a survivor of suicide loss, Medens Health has therapists and grief counselors ready to offer professional support to residents of California and Nevada, reach out to us by phone or text at (833) 624-5400, send us a message using our online contact form, or to register as a new patient get started here.

*If you or someone you know is experiencing a suicidal crisis, dial 911 call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at (800) 273-8255. For those who are impacted by loved ones who have had a non-fatal suicide crisis, or struggle with ongoing suicidal ideations, or non-suicidal self-injury (known as NSSI),Voice at the Table is a nationally recognized resource of support.

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^Disclaimer:

^‍^{The information provided in this blog is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Reliance on any information provided in this blog is solely at your own risk. Always seek the advice of your physician or a qualified mental health provider with any questions you may have regarding your medical or mental health. If you don’t currently have a therapist, we can connect you with one who is qualified to give you safe, professional, and ethical advice regarding your mental health.}