Breaking The Cycle: Replacing Negative Behaviors With Healthier Ones

Cycles are patterns that humans find comfort in, sometimes at the expense of their health, safety, or relationships. And whether it's a pattern of bad relationships, poor time management, or a bad habit—breaking a cycle is hard. Sometimes it's even hard to recognize the patterns that have a negative effect on your health or your life. 

We're talking about the habits that hold you back from living the life you want to live. In most cases, the consequences of bad habits have a huge impact on your physical health, mental health, social life, career, and relationships. Understanding how cycles form and how to break them are the first steps toward healing and creating new cycles that serve a better purpose for you.
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How do negative cycles start?
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There are a few reasons why negative habits are so easy to form, yet so difficult to break. Many cycles begin at an early age, through learned behavior from our parents. These cycles are formed from repeated exposure and are often passed down from one generation to the next. Some examples are:

• Being caring and empathetic—or the lack thereof.
• Yelling or giving the “silent treatment” as a way to express displeasure, frustration, or anger.
• Overeating to cope with uncomfortable feelings.
• Keeping a clean and tidy home. Or by contrast, keeping a dirty and cluttered home
• The type of attachment style you have when it comes to relationships

Some negative cycles, however, can develop without any influence from family or friends. In this case, people often develop these patterns as a way of coping with stress or boredom. Some examples of this are:

• Using substances like tobacco or alcohol as coping mechanisms
• Developing narcissistic characteristics
• Developing anxiety, OCD, or other characteristics in response to a traumatic event
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How to break a cycle
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During times of stress, familiar patterns are comforting. This is what makes breaking a cycle such a difficult - though not impossible - process. In most cases, breaking a cycle requires a lot of commitment and conscious effort. There is no easy way to do it, and there is no single solution that will work for everyone. However, there are several things that you can do to increase your chance of breaking a negative cycle and replacing it with a positive one.

• Know your reason why - Picture what your life will be like once the cycle is broken. Write down what your future will look like and make a written commitment to yourself. Having a clear understanding of the reasons why you need to make this change will help you persevere when motivation is low.
• Identify your triggers - This isn't so you can avoid your triggers, but so that you can develop new habits for dealing with them. If you have a cycle of avoiding a certain place because it makes you uncomfortable, perhaps your new habit can be going there with a support person. If you are in the cycle of blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong, your new cycle can be replacing your negative self-talk with positive affirmations. Finding healthy alternatives to replace your negative cycles is key when you identify your triggers.
• Seek help and support from family and friends - The more support you have, the more successful you will be in breaking the cycles that hold you back from the life you desire. You can start by asking your friends and family for support and to help hold you accountable to your goals. You can also search locally or online for support groups and talk to people who are going through similar experiences.
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Getting professional help

Breaking free of a bad cycle isn't easy, but with the right tools and support, it is possible! Working with a therapist is one extremely effective way to get the support you need. Therapists not only help you identify cycles you may not even be aware of, but they can also help you understand the triggers that are causing the cycle to continue. Your therapist will help you find healthy replacements for the habits that do not serve you and help keep you accountable. They can also provide the tools and resources you need to stay on track.

If you or someone you know is struggling to break a cycle, Medens Health is accepting new patients in California and Nevada. Reach out to us by phone or text at (833) 624-5400, or by filling out our online contact form.